Living with Undiagnosed Bipolar Disorder: Insights and Pathways for Understanding

Many individuals live for years without understanding they have a serious mental health condition. Bipolar disorder is one such condition that often goes unnoticed or undiagnosed for long periods. In this article, we explore personal experiences of such individuals and offer insights into recognizing and addressing bipolar disorder.

My Diagonal Experience: A 30-Year Journey with Undiagnosed Bipolar Disorder

I lived for 30 years with undiagnosed bipolar disorder, and it was a nightmare. Manic episodes occurred multiple times, but I dismissed them as a consequence of substance abuse. I experienced intense anger for no reason and a rapid switch from feeling good and motivated to deeply depressed.

Impulsive Behaviors and Risky Decisions

During these episodes, I engaged in impulsive behaviors such as shopping sprees. I bought lots of useless items that I never used. Risky behaviors, like having multiple sexual partners, also characterized my manic phases. Additionally, I experienced blackouts and severe memory problems, which I later learned were symptoms of mania.

Self-Medicating to Manage Symptom

In an attempt to self-medicate, I turned to synthetic opioids, thinking they would bring stability. These provided temporary relief, but eventually, I began experiencing hallucinations. This was my cue to seek professional help. Even after diagnosis, it took several years to truly understand what bipolar disorder entails. Learning about the symptoms and recognizing early signs of mood episodes required time and effort.

The Reality of Undiagnosed Bipolar Disorder

It is entirely possible for individuals to live with bipolar disorder without realizing it, especially during manic or depressive phases. People might feel extremely energized or frequently down and not consider it unusual. Often, friends or family members are the first to notice the signs.

Normalizing Mood Fluctuations

Long-term mood disorders can be accepted as part of one's personality or temperament. Phrases like, "I'm cranky," "I am passionate," and "I get very upset sometimes," can normalize moodiness. Families might reinforce this belief by saying, "Oh that's just how she is," or "That's just John being John." The misconception that one's moodiness is normal or part of their personality can hinder the recognition of a mood disorder.

Seeking Professional Help for Better Understanding and Management

Speaking with a psychologist or social worker is a valuable step in exploring the possibility of a mood disorder. Being candid about symptoms or elements that raise suspicions can lead to accurate identification. Seeking professional help has been crucial in managing bipolar disorder, making life significantly easier.

Understanding and managing undiagnosed bipolar disorder is a journey that requires awareness, patience, and support. By recognizing the symptoms and seeking professional help, individuals can find the path to a better and more fulfilling life.