The Psychology Behind Narcissists Spreading Discord

Narcissists often engage in pitting people against each other as a primal tactic to exert control, maintain their self-image, and derive a sense of superiority. This behavior serves multiple psychological purposes and is driven by deeper issues within these individuals.

Control and Manipulation

By creating conflict between individuals, narcissists can manipulate situations to their advantage. This allows them to maintain power over others and dictate social dynamics. They become the central figure in any conflict, making all other parties feel subordinate and dependent on their approval. This dynamic can be detrimental, as it fosters a sense of perpetual insecurity and vulnerability among those around them.

Validation of Self-Image

Narcissists have a fragile self-esteem and often seek validation from others. By causing competition or conflict, they can position themselves as the central figure, the enforcer, or the arbitrator. This process reinforces their self-image as superior, making them feel validated and increasingly entrenched in their sense of self-importance.

Diverting Attention

Narcissists thrive on drama and chaos as it provides them with excitement and engagement. By fostering discord, they can deflect attention away from their own flaws or shortcomings. When others are focused on fighting each other, they are less likely to scrutinize the narcissist's behavior and maintain their illusion of perfection.

Creating Drama and Entertainment

Some narcissists derive pure entertainment value from the chaos and drama that ensues when others are at odds with each other. They thrive on the excitement and engagement that conflict provides, often cultivating a dynamic environment that feeds their need for stimulation. This behavior is a form of manipulation, where the narcissist watches the show and enjoys the spectacle, ensuring they remain at the center of attention.

Insecurity and Fear of Abandonment

Narcissists often fear abandonment and may use the tactic of pitting people against each other to ensure that they remain in control of relationships. This approach can prevent others from forming alliances that could threaten the narcissist's position. By instigating conflict, they ensure that attention remains on them, thus reinforcing their central role in the relationship.

Testing Loyalty

Narcissists may use conflict to test the loyalty of those involved, ensuring that they remain the focal point of attention and allegiance. This behavior is a form of psychological manipulation, where the narcissist watches the dynamics unfold, waiting for signs of loyalty or betrayal. By doing so, they can maintain a sense of superiority and control over their relationships.

Overall, this behavior reflects deeper psychological issues within narcissists, including a lack of empathy, a desperate need for validation, and a need for control. It is a manifestation of their unhealthy desire to maintain a position of dominance and superiority in their relationships, often at the expense of others' emotional well-being.