Understanding and Addressing Misconceptions About AA and Sexual Behaviors

In recent discussions, a recurring theme has emerged regarding the perception of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) and its affiliated groups, particularly around the concept of 13th stepping. This practice, which involves inappropriate sexual behavior, has been a topic of intense debate and misunderstanding. This article aims to clarify common misconceptions and provide context surrounding AA, 12 step groups, and the issue of 13th stepping.

Perception of AA and 12 Step Groups

Amidst the discussion on the perception of AA, a notable proposal was that AA and similar 12 step groups could be considered cults. Many participants in these discussions ardently agreed. However, this view misses a crucial aspect of these groups: their inherent autonomy and decentralized structure. Each meeting is typically independent and not subject to centralized control, leading to diverse individual and group dynamics.

The organization of 12 step groups, while not as hierarchically structured as traditional cults, often gives rise to a perception of exploitation or control. Some individuals interpret the structure and roles within the groups as representing a hidden hierarchy, or comparing them to religious institutions when they lack a familiar reference point. This can lead to misunderstandings, as the groups are designed to empower individuals by fostering support and community, rather than controlling them.

Addressing 13th Stepping

13th Stepping, a practice that involves inappropriate sexual advances towards members who have a relatively short-term sobriety, has caused significant concern within the recovery community. Advocacy groups, such as Women for Sobriety, are vocal about the importance of protecting individuals, particularly women, from such behaviors. The issue of 13th stepping highlights the broader societal problem of sexual puritanism and prudishness that can permeate recovery environments.

The issue is not about literal rape, but rather about the exploitative and inappropriate sexual behavior that can occur within the confines of recovery groups. Such behavior is harmful and can cause extensive damage to individuals, undermining the very principles of recovery and support that these groups aim to provide.

While the literature and guidelines provided by AA and similar groups do not explicitly prohibit all forms of sexual activity, they emphasize the importance of developing a value system that promotes non-selfish and non-self-centered behavior. This includes maintaining appropriate boundaries, even within the context of supportive relationships.

Contextualizing Sexual Behavior in Recovery

Sexual behavior is a natural and fundamental aspect of human life. Within recovery groups, discussions often arise about the appropriate time to engage in relationships. While the suggestion to avoid relationships for the first year is common, it often leads to judgment and assumptions that can be harmful. It is important to recognize that many people do not heed this advice, and when both individuals are in the early stages of recovery, the atmosphere can sometimes be misconstrued.

The concepts of sexual puritanism and prudishness that can manifest in recovery groups are reflections of broader cultural attitudes. These attitudes can be problematic in themselves and can exacerbate issues for marginalized groups, such as LGBTQ individuals, who might face additional challenges within the recovery community.

Ultimately, the responsibility for addressing problematic sexual behaviors lies not only with the individuals involved but also with the supportive networks and leadership within recovery groups. A clear and open dialogue is essential to ensure that individuals are protected and that recovery environments remain safe and supportive.

Conclusion: The debate surrounding AA, 12 step groups, and 13th stepping reveals deeper issues related to sexual behavior, cultural attitudes, and the dynamics of support systems within recovery communities. By fostering a more understanding and inclusive environment, we can work towards ensuring that recovery is a safe space for all individuals, free from harmful behaviors and judgments.