Why 'The Cause of His Death was Drinking Too Much' Sounds Informal and Why Formal Alternatives are Preferred

When documenting the cause of someone's death, especially in a formal setting like a medical report, you may encounter a situation where the phrasing feels slightly awkward. Take, for instance, the sentence, "The cause of his death was drinking too much.' Such phrasing can seem informal and lack the analytical and professional tone required in such situations. To fully understand why this phrasing sounds informal, and to learn more formally appropriate alternatives, let's break it down.

Why "The Cause of His Death was Drinking Too Much" Sounds Informal

The phrase "The cause of his death was drinking too much" sounds somewhat awkward for a few reasons. Firstly, the term "cause of death" evokes a serious, often clinical, tone. However, the phrase "drinking too much" is relatively informal and somewhat judgmental. This juxtaposition can make the sentence feel unprofessional, as it is more like something a police officer or coroner might say after an autopsy, but not reflective of the person's or their medical profile.

Moreover, "drinking too much" does not offer specific information about the cause of death. It does not detail what specific issues may have led to the death, such as alcohol poisoning from a one-time drinking event at night, or the more complex effects of years of repeated overdrinking, like gout, liver or kidney failure, and complications from chronic drinking.

Alternatives to Make the Sentence More Formal and Professional

For a more formal and professional tone, consider the following alternatives:

1. "The Cause of His Death was Excessive Drinking"

This phrasing is clear and concise while maintaining a professional tone. It indicates the frequency and severity of the behavior without the potentially judgmental connotations of "too much."

Example: The cause of his death was excessive drinking.

2. "Excessive Drinking Caused His Death"

This construction highlights the cause-effect relationship and provides a more direct and clear statement. It emphasizes that the excessive drinking was the direct cause of the death.

Example: Excessive drinking caused his death.

Examples in Context

For a comprehensive and unbiased medical report or legal document, you might find these phrasings more appropriate:

Medical Report:

(Doctor's Report)

"The cause of his death was excessive drinking. Chronic alcohol consumption led to liver cirrhosis, which ultimately caused his death."

(Coroner's Report)

"Excessive alcohol consumption over a period of several years contributed to the death of the individual. The final cause of death is classified as liver failure secondary to alcohol-induced fatty liver disease."

Why Formal Alternatives Matter in Documentation

Using formal and professional phrasing in critical documents such as medical reports, coroner's reports, and legal documentation ensures that the information is conveyed in a clear, unbiased, and accurate manner. This professionalism also helps to avoid any misinterpretation or bias that might arise from informal language.

Conclusion

In summary, the phrase "The cause of his death was drinking too much" may feel awkward and informal due to its lack of specific detail and the potential judgmental nature of the phrase "too much." Formal alternatives like "The cause of his death was excessive drinking" or "Excessive drinking caused his death" are more fitting for professional and clinical contexts. Using such language not only maintains a professional tone but also ensures that the information conveyed is clear and unbiased.